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What if Microsoft Paint was a really dark, desolate place featuring a lot of nudity and overwrought dialogue? DeviantArt is a good guess, but actually it's The Void.
The Long Sleep Review
The part of Mysteriously Whispering Naked Lady Narrator (MWNLN) will be played by Keira Knightley with laryngitis.
Narrator 2 will be played by Lord Voldemort. From the first movie, not the last one.
The part of The PLAYER will be played by Doubtingthomas396.